NOTE: This is a post I wrote for NAMI Juneau's Blog and Newsletter. A big thank you to Crystal for her editing!
The holidays can be a wonderful time of year. They can also be stressful and for some individuals living with a mental illness, the holidays may exacerbate symptoms. Perhaps there is the loss of a loved one who is not joining the family at the table this year. There may be negative or strained family dynamics that make it difficult to gather. There can be the stress of trying to find the right gift for everyone, or if money is tight, not being able to buy gifts at all. If any of the above sounds familiar, this may be the time of year for serious self-care.
When I notice signs that mental illness is rearing its head and triggers are going off left and right, I find that stepping back and practicing mindfulness is a quick and powerful way to care for myself. Mindfulness practice has gained a large following. I think some people avoid the practice out of fear that it is too difficult or too involved, but at its core, mindfulness is simply the act of keeping the mind on what is happening inside and outside of your body.
Some teachers recommend starting with a small piece of fruit, like a raisin or a plum and simply using your senses to notice all you can about that object: the color, texture, scent, taste, and possibly sound. They also state that there is no goal of mindfulness. It’s not about relaxing or attaining an enlightened state. If you are searching for those, you are, by definition, not practicing mindfulness. That is not to say that relaxation doesn’t occur while practicing and there are many relaxation techniques which rely on mindfulness. But, aiming at a goal takes you out of the present, which is where mindfulness happens.
Jon Kabat-Zinn is one of the most popular teachers of secular mindfulness with his book Mindfulness for Beginners, and his more extensive book, Full Catastrophe Living which is based on the 8-week Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction workshop. The first is a basic, sound introduction to the practice, the other is an 8-week course for reducing stress in all areas of life using mindfulness.
This newsletter is not the place to give a complete introduction to this practice, but a sample may be in order. Here is a three-minute practice to try:
- Take a moment to be still. This is your time for mindfulness practice.
- Begin this mindful check-in by feeling into your body and mind and simply allowing any waves of thought, emotion, or physical sensation to just be.
- Maybe this is the first break you have had, today. Maybe you’ve been busy. As you enter the world of being rather than doing, you may notice the trajectory of the feelings that you’ve been carrying within yourself.
- There’s no need to judge, analyze, or figure things out. Simply allow yourself to be here and now, in the middle of everything that is present at this moment. We’ll take about three minutes to check in with ourselves in this way.
- As we near the end of this mindful check-in, congratulate yourself for taking the time to do this practice and to directly contribute to your health and well-being.
(Adapted from Stahl, B., & Goldstein, E. (2010). A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications. p 21).
As far as that gift buying stress, this article in PychCentral says, “New research from American University proposes that mindfulness can counteract the adverse impacts of mindless consumption due to automatic thoughts, habits, and unhealthy behavior patterns.” The key to mindfulness is awareness.
Mindfulness won’t change you. What it will do is provide more awareness of what you are doing and experiencing, allowing you to make the changes you want to make.
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Here are a few more resources for handling grief, the feeling of having too much to do, and healthy boundaries.
Here’s to a less stressful, mindful holiday season!
Alonzo
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